Curse

I don't know why
But this morning I realized I'm cursed - hear me sigh?

Rudolph's blight - his curse pained my sight
When it became evident under the bathroom light

By Rudoloph I don't mean the Roman who played THE sheik
the one who made the scantly clad princesses feel meek

My Rudoloph, and he's the one you absolutely must know
Is the fabled reindeer who pulls the fat man's sleigh through sky and snow

But my nose doesn't gleam
It's worthless, just red and no it can't be cleaned

How can this happen to a 36 year old man?
Damn it -- this curse can't stand

By next year this time it'll be fixed
Because Rudolph will meet my brand new .30-06

Even then, if it's not really better
Someone has to take the blame, I'm American, remember?
chimney, an ambush I will fix